‘Our generation is lonelier than others’ | Global News Avenue

Last year, Juliette Sartori decided to expand her social circle, so she went for coffee with three people she’d never met before.

“It’s going really well,” she said.

“We ended up talking for two hours and I still talk to them today. We all stay in touch.”

Her friendship blind date was part of Dinner with Strangers, a club that Juliet and her roommates started “on a whim” for fellow Glasgow University students who wanted to meet new people.

Juliette, 21, who moved to Scotland from the United States to study business and management, said it was difficult to connect with others immediately because she found people “had a wall” and were isolated.

Because students are so connected and digital that they spend less and less time interacting face-to-face, she doesn’t have many opportunities to expand her circle of friends.

And thus, Dinner with Strangers was born.

“We thought only 30 people would join,” Juliet said. “We just don’t know what to expect.

“It was a whimsical idea and the name was daunting from the start.”

But 200 people signed up in the first month, including male, female and non-binary students at both undergraduate and graduate levels, and the association has grown since then.

Juliet’s friendship lottery is very different from the swipe-right culture of dating apps that dominates the lives of many young people.

First, it’s about friendship rather than a romantic hookup. But it also eschews complex computer algorithms, relying instead on a more traditional personality quiz shared online with members at the beginning of each month.

Potential dates are asked questions about topics ranging from their favorite music genre or favorite Disney movie to their dream vacation spot.

Juliette and five others then spent hours manually matching people and sharing contact details, then stepped back and let the magic happen.

Mary Iolcagi plays platonic Cupid alongside Juliet, who soon realizes she’s not the only one struggling to find friends in college.

Originally from Cyprus, she said: “There are so many people here from different backgrounds and it’s really scary to feel like you’re different and people won’t understand you.”

The 22-year-old believes social media has had a negative impact on friendships.

Today, more and more people are comparing their lives to others online.

“It’s easy to get caught up in false ideas on social media, which can lead to feelings of isolation and expectations that can never be met,” Mary said.

“People are lonelier now. Our generation is lonelier.”

But Mary said dining with strangers made her realize the beauty of blind friendship dates.

“I think one of the most important parts of college is meeting new people,” said the fourth-year economics and philosophy major.

“This way you don’t give power to the differences between people, you give power to the important thing in a friendship, which is the similarities you have.”

She describes it as a “unique” way to meet and connect with other people from around the world.

Sophomores Vanya and Hannah were paired up at dinner with strangers last December, believing they would never have met without the group.

Hannah, 20, from Manchester, said: “Society puts so much emphasis on romance that we forget the importance of friendship.”

She said that before meeting Vanya she was “miserable” and would spend a lot of time alone, but now her mental health has improved and she is more confident.

The two are now best friends and roommates.

Vanya, 19, said she was delighted to meet Hannah and had no “preconceived ideas and expectations”.

“People talk to so many people online that they can’t talk to anyone properly,” said the economics student from India.

“This way you go in with a completely open mind and you get to know someone as the conversation goes on.

“You have to show you’re making a real effort.”

For Juliette, going on friendship dates with strangers helped her find “someone.”

She’s confused as to why people think it’s abnormal to meet new people through friendship dates, but believes there will soon be more opportunities to take part in this “fun experiment”.

“It’s more of a modern way of making friends,” she said.

“The idea is to meet someone online from a dating site and then turn that into a friendship by seeing how well you mesh with that person.”

Dating apps like Bumble have already begun creating similar versions of hookups, which Juliet believes will become more mainstream as the idea expands.

She said: “With people now working from home and attending university remotely, it’s more common for people to be at home all the time and you’re less likely to go out and meet new people like you did five years ago.

“It’s modern, but I think it will become more popular in the future.”